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Katie Smith

In foggy grey



There’s a lot of little choices to be made right now; not as many big choices as usual, but the little things seem more constant. While some are still having babies and moving towns, the majority of us are choosing between a walk and a book, a phone call and a video, a home project and a new recipe, take out or delivery, a screen or a sigh. It doesn't make the choices less significant. In fact it is the opposite. Too often when we are not analyzing complicated data, we develop atrophy in our decision-making.


These little things don't stick out like the mountains and valleys of grand life choices. The black and white forces us to consider consequences more seriously, but these grey days that we live now prove more costly because they can produce a slower fade.


This is not to say that we must maneuver through a manual of new choices, but rather respect the unknown in the hands of another. Every choice becomes purposeful yet prayerful, elaborate yet effortless, careful yet careless. Much like my life- lowly yet lofty. We are all oxymoronic by nature. That's how we avoid extremes. Wasn't that the kind of life we were all called to live from the start? Well-balanced.


Some lives are no different than before the virus, but the little things, like not wanting to touch your face or phone at an annual appointment means lifting up prayers in the "grey" in-between, or imagining new ideas that can actually become realities through creativity or distant community. Space, distance, and time are precious gifts given in abundance right now.


Boredom allows us to think on that which gives us pressure (the non-lovely things) or that which gives us peace (loving others first). There is more occasion for gratitude than many like to focus on through the foggy lens or “new normal.” If we don't note the need to make little decisions purposeful, our purpose begins to fade into foggy grey. Make a choice to dabble in some new bright colors. Choose faith over fear.




Making choices with carefully careless color. ~CC

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